I love him. I am his best friend, his lover and I'll be there whenever he needs me.
What we have might change over time, we might find other lovers, but I will always love him, even if that love change.
I wish he and I could have a life together, I miss having him next to me when I wake in the morning, sex is great but it's a bonus, if I had to choose between having him as a lover or live with my best friend I would choose the latter. He has been the constant in my life for the past years, even if I had no one else to trust or turn to, I had him. He was the lifeboat in the storms of my life. I have loved a few others before him and during the times we were just friends, though since I realized I loved him more then my best friend my love have been constant, I might have hated him at times, wished he would leave me alone but I have loved him just the same.
The best friend in me wants him to find that special someone and the lover in me wishes that would be me.
I am in conflict with myself many times, but the love, respect, compassion and happiness I feel for him have stayed the same.
People have asked me if there's been others, if I really have loved him for theses last years of our lifes, and I have been intressted in others I have but the love I have for him is greater, ”So why do you settle for an open relationship”, I didn't settle for one, this is what he wanted so this is what it is. And that might sound like I settled, and if I have I am alright with it, and I never asked to be anything else either...
I get to be with the man I love above anything in this world and he is my best friend, how can I not be happy with what I have?
Don't take me wrong but are you really sure that this is what you want and not what he wants? Open relationship is not for all, there is only a few that can handle this sort of relationship. Still it's your choice in the end and if that makes you happy, go for it.
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